The past few weeks have been particularly difficult leaving me feeling quite depressed. While at the bookstore to get gifts for my daughters birthday I happened along this book written by Mark Linden O'Meara, 'The Feeling Soul'. I bought it after reading the first paragraph in the introduction:
Quote: In our quest to heal from troubles many of us have heard that we should 'move on and let go.' Although the advice seems appropriate, many of us do not know how to let go. In some way we feel stuck, knowing what we want, but unsure how to proceed or what even the true problem might be. Although you may have an intuitive sense of yourself that is untouched by hurt, trauma and fear, you are unsure of how to achieve this sense on a daily basis. You somehow hope that you can rediscover a sense of childlike joy in adult living. Many of you have been hurt and are surviving yet there seems to be something missing in your life.
It's hard for me to express myself. While I've experienced hurt and trauma I think what I most need to 'get over' is that I inflicted hurt and trauma by some of the choices I made. I want to learn how to take and accept responsibility for the past and be mindful of it but to live in the present.
Another paragraph in the book was: There is an Irish proverb that says 'You don't plow a field by turning it over in your mind.' While some evaluation is necessary, too much rumination can lead you into a spiral of self-absorption rather than being able to see the world around you.' I live in the past and it keeps me from everything. To heal my relationships I have to heal myself.
